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    Aeon Krieger

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    Gambit



    Posts : 13
    Join date : 2015-09-27
    Age : 26

    Aeon Krieger

    Post by Gambit on Sun Sep 27, 2015 4:02 am

    Name: Aeon Krieger
    Nickname: Goes by both Aeon or Krieger
    Age + Birthday: 18 January 13
    Gender: Male
    Sexuality: Straight
    Species: Nephalem(Not biological caused by a dark ritual)
    Species Ability/Perk: Race info- Nephalem are the rare mix of angels and demons, generally this offspring isn't born as it is forbidden for an angel and demon to mate. Those born or created through alternative methods are said to wield bizarre abilities/magic usually making them unique in some way when compared to its parents or creators. As they are a mix of both holy and unholy beings they suffer from both demon and god slayers, but even with this weakness they can pose to be quite a threat in combat due to their unique ability(s). Born or created through alternative methods these humanoid beings walk a very slime line between good and evil, but once their choice is made they can never turn back. It is due to this that they can either be your best friend or mortal enemy. Unlike most humanoid creatures these ones physically stop aging at twenty-six allowing them to stay in a physical peak condition, but this doesn't mean they're ageless it just means that aging forward effects stop once they reach that point in their life. Typically the born ones have said to live just as long as an angel or demon, unfortunately those created through other methods have only triple the average lifespan as their original race.

    -Can detect angelic and demonic creatures in a ten foot area that increases by ten feet each rank up. Works on humanoid(s), animal(s), or monster(s) of angelic and/or demonic bloodline or  that were changed by magical purposes.(Only detects those of same rank or lower)
    -Has retractable bird and bat like wings allowing a max fly speed of thirty miles per hour(Locked until B). The four wings wings consist of a pair of neon white bird like and a a pair of midnight black bat like wings that each have a twelve foot wingspan. Fly speed increases by ten miles per hour each rank up.
    Anything Special: Always seen with a bandage on his nose. Scars all over his arms, legs, chest, and back.

    Personality: Aeon is or at least he was human until he was abducted as a child and used in a dark ritual. Thanks to this experience he hates both demons and angels since he saw people with both bird birdlike wings along with bat like which later turned out to be angels and demons working together. He still looks human, but he is no longer human instead he is now a mix of the two. Aeon's personality has developed into that of a person who looks continuously for a strong opponent until he is strong enough to take down the group that turned him into what he is. While he looks for strong opponents he likes good sportsmanship in a fight with it simply being a fair fight whether it be on numbers or equal power. Like most normal people he's afraid of losing those that get close to him, that empty feeling mentally brings him back to when he was a kid during the dark ritual that changed him. Over all Aeon is a kind person he just has scars both physically and mental that he doesn't want anyone else to see. If someone finds out about his scars and/or past he will refuse to acknowledge their questions about them regardless of who they are. His only response is "It doesn't concern you." and will take his leave from the room or building.
    When he isn't training or sparring he is reading or observing the different creatures on the planet as it allows him access to their physical aspects with his magic.

    When it come to combat he'll act normally, but if anything involves angels and/or demons he acts like a cornered wild beast in the fight making his moves less predictable along with him focusing on those specific enemies. To be quite honest Aeon isn't the leader type at all as he prefers to follow, but when the situation calls for it he's willing to take the lead if it means his allies can get out safely even if it means he has to stay behind. When it comes to the start of combat he prefers to to face the enemy head on even though it doesn't work in all situations. Aeon's means of fighting is mixed boxing so his attacks will vary based on the type of enemy he fights, while he might not look it he actually is rather clever in combat. He can be categorized as a bruiser or a tank it all depends on the situation this also means he's willing to play the role of decoy for a plan to work.
    Likes:-Training/a good battle- He enjoys a good fair fight.
    -Observing different types of creatures- Its a requirement for his magic.
    -Fair fights- Is a sportsman
    Dislikes:-Mages abusing their power- He's a living example of mages abusing their power and doesn't want others to go through that.
    -Losing a fight- As a fighter this is a given, but he will accept a loss and come back stronger next time.
    -Cheaters- He's a sportsman thus wants a fair fight
    -Angels and demons of the group Salamandra- They kidnapped him and turned him into what he is now.
    Motivations:-To become the strongest mixed boxer in Fiore-
    -See every creature in Earthland- This way he can make his magic stronger.
    -Battle someone from every form of martial arts both normal and magical- The thrill of combat and to achieve the first listed motivation.
    Fears:-Losing those close to him- He's already lost so much as is.
    -Running out of strong adversaries- Enjoys the thrill of combat too much.
    -Dark rituals(causes him to go berserk on the enemies)- A dark ritual was used to change him from human to an artificial Nephalem.


    Height: 5’10
    Weight: 165 lbs
    Hair color & Style: White and spiky
    Eye Color: Grey(has full sight)
    Skin Tone: Light tan
    Physical Appearance & Clothing: Standing at five foot ten inches he isn’t too tall or too short and weighs in at one hundred sixty-five pounds. Generally he will wear a track suit when out training or on a job, but when in the guildhall he wears a black suit and tie with an orange dress shirt. Normally he keeps his hands and feet wrapped when in his track suit while in the suit he wears a pair of fingerless gloves.

    Guild/Council: Arcana Force
    Guild/Council Tattoo: Navy Blue on right shoulder


    Last edited by Gambit on Tue Oct 27, 2015 8:03 pm; edited 11 times in total
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    Mizuko



    Posts : 300
    Join date : 2015-09-07

    Re: Aeon Krieger

    Post by Mizuko on Mon Sep 28, 2015 11:27 am

    Hallo!! I'm Mizuko, and I'll be grading your app today!

    To start with, your perks need more information. You gave the bare minimum, and that's good, but there is still a lot more information you can put in there. For example, 50 ft is a bit large for a simple D-Rank mage, so you may want to set it so that the range increases as you rank up. That would also give you the possibility to have it go much, much farther at X-Rank.

    Your personality is a bit below the required WC of 350. As well as this, there's little to no separation between in and out of battle personas.

    Everything from your likes to your fears need 1 sentence descriptions.

    Fix that up, and then bump ^.^
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    Gambit



    Posts : 13
    Join date : 2015-09-27
    Age : 26

    Re: Aeon Krieger

    Post by Gambit on Mon Sep 28, 2015 7:38 pm

    bump
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    Mizuko



    Posts : 300
    Join date : 2015-09-07

    Re: Aeon Krieger

    Post by Mizuko on Mon Sep 28, 2015 8:57 pm

    Your perks still need more description. What do the wings look like? Is there a set amount of distance you can fly, once you hit it? Does this distance and speed increase as you go to A rank, ect;? Define 'angelic' and 'demonic'? Does this include all creatures of angelic or demonic descent in any way? Or just those who are mostly angel or demon?
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    Gambit



    Posts : 13
    Join date : 2015-09-27
    Age : 26

    Re: Aeon Krieger

    Post by Gambit on Tue Sep 29, 2015 7:04 pm

    bump
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    Mizuko



    Posts : 300
    Join date : 2015-09-07

    Re: Aeon Krieger

    Post by Mizuko on Sat Oct 03, 2015 2:46 pm

    Okay, one last thing xD. The wings. Are they both coming out at once, or are they separate? And where are they when they're not in use? Are they sitting on the back, tucked against each other, or are they able to disappear?
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    Gambit



    Posts : 13
    Join date : 2015-09-27
    Age : 26

    Re: Aeon Krieger

    Post by Gambit on Sat Oct 03, 2015 3:16 pm

    bump and its mentioned they're retractable so when not in use they go away.
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    Mizuko



    Posts : 300
    Join date : 2015-09-07

    Re: Aeon Krieger

    Post by Mizuko on Sat Oct 03, 2015 3:51 pm

    That wasn't clear to me at first, which is why I asked. 1st approval given.
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    Sun Wukong



    Posts : 125
    Join date : 2015-09-07

    Re: Aeon Krieger

    Post by Sun Wukong on Tue Oct 06, 2015 12:11 am

    Everything looks to be in order, I give you your second approval~

    @Gambit wrote:Name: Aeon Krieger
    Nickname: Goes by both Aeon or Krieger
    Age + Birthday: 18 January 13
    Gender: Male
    Sexuality: Straight
    Species: Nephilim(Not biological caused by a dark ritual)
    Species Ability/Perk: -Can detect angelic and demonic creatures in a twenty foot area that increases by twenty feet each rank up. Works on any creature of angelic and/or demonic bloodline or  that were changed by magical purposes.
    -Has retractable bird and bat like wings allowing a max fly speed of fifty miles per hour(Locked until B). The four wings wings consist of a pair of neon white bird like and a a pair of midnight black bat like wings that each have a twelve foot wingspan. Fly speed increases by ten miles per hour each rank up.
    Anything Special: Always seen with a bandage on his nose. Scars all over his arms, legs, chest, and back.

    Personality: Aeon is or at least he was human until he was abducted as a child and used in a dark ritual. Thanks to this experience he hates both demons and angels since he saw people with both bird birdlike wings along with bat like which later turned out to be angels and demons working together. He still looks human, but he is no longer human instead he is now a mix of the two. Aeon's personality has developed into that of a person who looks continuously for a strong opponent until he is strong enough to take down the group that turned him into what he is. While he looks for strong opponents he likes good sportsmanship in a fight with it simply being a fair fight whether it be on numbers or equal power. Like most normal people he's afraid of losing those that get close to him, that empty feeling mentally brings him back to when he was a kid during the dark ritual that changed him. Over all Aeon is a kind person he just has scars both physically and mental that he doesn't want anyone else to see. If someone finds out about his scars and/or past he will refuse to acknowledge their questions about them regardless of who they are. His only response is "It doesn't concern you." and will take his leave from the room or building.
    When he isn't training or sparring he is reading or observing the different creatures on the planet as it allows him access to their physical aspects with his magic.

    When it come to combat he'll act normally, but if anything involves angels and/or demons he acts like a cornered wild beast in the fight making his moves less predictable along with him focusing on those specific enemies. To be quite honest Aeon isn't the leader type at all as he prefers to follow, but when the situation calls for it he's willing to take the lead if it means his allies can get out safely even if it means he has to stay behind. When it comes to the start of combat he prefers to to face the enemy head on even though it doesn't work in all situations. Aeon's means of fighting is mixed boxing so his attacks will vary based on the type of enemy he fights, while he might not look it he actually is rather clever in combat. He can be categorized as a bruiser or a tank it all depends on the situation this also means he's willing to play the role of decoy for a plan to work.
    Likes:-Training/a good battle- He enjoys a good fair fight.
    -Observing different types of creatures- Its a requirement for his magic.
    -Fair fights- Is a sportsman
    Dislikes:-Mages abusing their power- He's a living example of mages abusing their power and doesn't want others to go through that.
    -Losing a fight- As a fighter this is a given, but he will accept a loss and come back stronger next time.
    -Cheaters- He's a sportsman thus wants a fair fight
    -Angels and demons of the group Salamandra- They kidnapped him and turned him into what he is now.
    Motivations:-To become the strongest mixed boxer in Fiore-
    -See every creature in Earthland- This way he can make his magic stronger.
    -Battle someone from every form of martial arts both normal and magical- The thrill of combat and to achieve the first listed motivation.
    Fears:-Losing those close to him- He's already lost so much as is.
    -Running out of strong adversaries- Enjoys the thrill of combat too much.
    -Dark rituals(causes him to go berserk on the enemies)- A dark ritual was used to change him from human to an artificial nephilim.


    Height: 5’10
    Weight: 165 lbs
    Hair color & Style: White and spiky
    Eye Color: Grey(has full sight)
    Skin Tone: Light tan
    Physical Appearance & Clothing: Standing at five foot ten inches he isn’t too tall or too short and weighs in at one hundred sixty-five pounds. Generally he will wear a track suit when out training or on a job, but when in the guildhall he wears a black suit and tie with an orange dress shirt. Normally he keeps his hands and feet wrapped when in his track suit while in the suit he wears a pair of fingerless gloves.

    Guild/Council: Blue Pegasus
    Guild/Council Tattoo: Navy Blue on right shoulder



    Staff Siggy:

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    Bacon



    Posts : 577
    Join date : 2015-03-08

    Re: Aeon Krieger

    Post by Bacon on Wed Oct 07, 2015 9:37 am

    Detection ability: No, you need to graph it out. "Any" doesn't fly by. What do I mean by graph? Here's an example:

    At D rank, You can: detect those of demonic/angelic lineage within a 10 feet radius if and only if they are of equal rank and lower.
    At C rank, you can detect those of demonic and angelic lineage within a 20 foot radius if and only if they are of equal and or lower rank that you

    Etc...

    Does this only pertain to animals or humans as well. Please state that.
    Please bump when changes gave been made.
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    Gambit



    Posts : 13
    Join date : 2015-09-27
    Age : 26

    Re: Aeon Krieger

    Post by Gambit on Wed Oct 07, 2015 10:46 am

    bump
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    Bacon



    Posts : 577
    Join date : 2015-03-08

    Re: Aeon Krieger

    Post by Bacon on Wed Oct 07, 2015 11:09 am

    Before approval, I'm guessing that this does not affect PC characters?
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    Gambit



    Posts : 13
    Join date : 2015-09-27
    Age : 26

    Re: Aeon Krieger

    Post by Gambit on Sat Oct 17, 2015 12:12 am

    Bump and I honestly don't see why it wouldn't work on PCs
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    Selenia



    Posts : 760
    Join date : 2015-10-11
    Age : 22

    Re: Aeon Krieger

    Post by Selenia on Mon Oct 26, 2015 4:41 pm

    Hi! I'm Selenia, and I'll be grading your app with permission from Bacon :D

    App looks great, just a few minor things to change before I can give you the first approval (sorry for the wait!)

    First of all, need information in your app in the section where you describe your character perks/abilities as to what a nephilim is. I have no clue as of now, so you need to elaborate on the history of the race, what exactly they are, and how your character fits in with all of that, as much information as you can think of.

    Also, your flight speed for your second perk has to max out at 30 miles per hour.

    Second is the guild: Infernal Titan has become Arcana Force, if you'd like to still be in Dragon's (who is now Forge) guild.

    Once those edits are made, please bump and I'll get to it as soon as possible. Thank you again for the patience!
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    Gambit



    Posts : 13
    Join date : 2015-09-27
    Age : 26

    Re: Aeon Krieger

    Post by Gambit on Tue Oct 27, 2015 8:05 pm

    bump and i used the wrong race for what i was going for the one i originally had was angel/human this is the actual angel/demon that was my bad on that mistake
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    Selenia



    Posts : 760
    Join date : 2015-10-11
    Age : 22

    Re: Aeon Krieger

    Post by Selenia on Tue Oct 27, 2015 8:15 pm

    Everything looks good, you're approved :D Congratulations~




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