Fairy Tail Online RP

Welcome Guest! Your last visit was . You have made 37 posts! Please welcome our newest member, Mistress Emma!

Site Maintenance. Please Move Here: www.fairytailhaven.forumotion.com

    Pale Wolf

    Share
    avatar
    Pale Wolf



    Posts : 4
    Join date : 2015-11-03

    Pale Wolf

    Post by Pale Wolf on Fri Nov 06, 2015 5:24 pm

    Pale Wolf
    Brutum Vir
    26
    August 8
    Demon (Brutum)
    Rank D
    Chaotic Neutral
    Male


    Species Ability/Perk
    The Brutum is a race of savage Demi-demons once descended from humans that had the essence of a powerful demon forced into the very nature of their being with the purpose to cultivate these "Pieces of Taint". While the Brutum where still weak they would venture into the world as to best and consume the hearts of demons as to amass more taint which to pass on to the coming generations. The overall putpose of this endeavor was for the Brutum to return one day so that the demon could indulge on its own seeds as to grow even more powerful than before With every generation they strayed further and further from the path of men and eventually came to forget the "Divine" objective placed upon them. While they still hunt demons in modern times it's more out of tradition rather than for a cause. Furthermore they've started to fight about anything that moves as what could be considered their society mostly revolves around fghting and survival. They are very much aware of the demonic taint that lingers withing them and embraces it just as one would his own hand. While mostly human in appearance their generally unpleasant aura and bright red eyes make them easy to tell apart from the common folk. Most people haven't even heard of them considering that there is but a few small settlements in the world and their numbers being in that of the hundreds due to the extreme measures take as to ensure the strongest offspring. While said settlements exists many Brutum rather take up living in the wilds or applying as mercenaries to travel about and see the world. As proof of their demonic heritage they possess physical strenght suprior to that of most races and the innate ability to utilize their innate taint as a physical being to fight with them.

    Enchanced Strenght: Pale possess abnormal strenght when compared to that of most humanoid species, being able to perform at the superhuman level as it's simply natural for him. It makes it easier for him to lift heavy objects, destructive capabilities and overall damage output from physical attacks which scales as he ranks up to C and beyond.

    As for carriable weight with both his hands:
    D: 600lbs C:1000lbs B:1400lbs A:1800lbs S: 2200lbs SS: 2600lbs X: 3000lbs

    The user also gains percentual boost with non-magical attacks of the physical kind, such as one's fists or a blade held in one's hand. This effect only applies for physical attacks or close range weaponry of the non-magical kind unless under the effect of a support spell or the weapon in question being enchanted while the boost on such weapons would be restricted to normal attacks done with it rather than active abilities and the effect boost granted by this perk cut in half in favor of enchanted weapons relying on their magical effect rather than the physical aspect, thus the same rules aplying to those to some extent. The added on value is also to be considered his base value which in turn gets taken into account when calculating further strenght boosts.
    So if for an exaple the user would attack using his own fists the damage dealt would be equal to the base strenght value plus the new value added unto that which scales as follows:
    D: 30% C: 50% B: 70% A: 100% S: 140% SS: 170% X: 200%

    The "Curse": He has a certain "quirk" forced upon him as he's unable to strike at any living thing for any reason but self-defese or in the defense of others. The "Curse" itself was cast on him by a priest residing in a village where Pale had tracked a demon and cut through a fifth of the village's population while doing so. An important thing to note is that the curse won't bind him in the case he fights opponents that aren't actually alive; counting things such as Golems and Automatons etc.


    Special Unique Characteristics

    The Pale: Having amassed an abnormal amount of Demonic Taint into his body even by Brutum standards his skin has turned as white as Ivory as all the pigment cells in his skin came to die as he reached this stage in spiritual maturity which the Brutum honour as "The Pale".

    Short Straw: The Brutum possess an exeptionally short lifespan when compared to most humanoid species as they only life for 40 years tops, most of them not even reaching their twenties due to their risky way of life; seeking dangerous prey and opponents. The cause of this is unknown but it's widely assumed that their demonic ancestry plays a part in this.


    Character Depth
    As a member of the Brutum tribe he has a pretty simple outlook on things, often remarking that humans has made things way too complicated for themselves. The Brutum just follows their instincts and hunt for the mere sake of it, why must there be something in it, must there be an ulterior motive? Can't they just hunt because that is afterall what they do? Even the few Brutum that do take up a life outside the tribe and the hunt are encouraged to do so if their will is true. All in all, he'd prefer to keep things simple.

    Being a no nonsense kind of guy he's far from the sociable kind and he's usually reluctant to speak, although when he does, he typically has something important to say. He's really blunt when he finally does talk and doesn't exactly beat around the bushes, getting straight to the point regardless of how inconsiderate it is. While many would brush him off as cold hearted he's just unfamiliar with social customs. While not unable to experience human emotions it's all a matter of adapting to him. Fact is that he knows next to nothing about human culture and civilized life in general as he never really interacted with humans like that in the past. He often finds himself lost and confused when faced with modern customs and technologies but refuses to admit so in most cases. While a bit behind in human development he's in no way stupid, being very sharpminded in fact as he often takes notice of details; something to be expected of a hunter.

    In battle he's pretty unorthodox, relying on no code of honour besides that of battle itself; for there to be a winner. Being a close up fighter he relies mostly on his own physical strenght, close to middle ranged spells and spells to keep ensure he stays in close proximity to his opponent. So basically he's the kind of fighter that does about everything to keep it close and personal to finish things as quickly as possible. In fact his agressive fighting style partly stems from his demon blood but also partially from the curse, as it just lets him fight properly for defensive measures he's just so excited that he gets to let loose that he makes the most out of fights when he do finally get himself mixed into one, the curse having ironically made him stronger when it does let him fight. He makes a point out of not wasting more energy than he needs to on opponents weaker than himself and usually manages to do so without wasting more energy than neccessary. Though when fighting an adversary of equal or greater measure than himself he will simply go all out and do whatever it takes too stand up to such opponents while not being the kind of fool to just blindly raise his fist at such adversaries. While he enjoys the thrill of fighting he realises now that there's such a thing as picking your battles, preferably winning ones.

    Likes:
    -The strong: He values the worth of the individual rather than that of the community and carries a deep respect for the few who actually possess true power, often disregarding people with political power as "Pretentious good-for nothings"

    -Fighting: Nature's one true sport, survival of the fittest, the one game that never ends. As a Brutum he feels very much alive while fighting and most would just assume that's because they're nothing short of barbarians in the end. They might not be so far off actually as the Brutum honestly couldn't think of a better sport. As the truest of competitions with all or nothing on the line they consider it the one way you can do things, once again taking pleasure in the simple things

    -Animals: He's often at better odds with animals and beasts as they're kind of like him, simple and honest creatures. So while he's not at the point where he can actually speak with animals he does seem to have a deeper connection with them, they often seeming to enjoy his company as well.

    -Sweets: Having never tasted anything like it before he was at first unsure but has come to develop a bit of a sweet tooth, having taken a liking to pretty much any sort of sweet.

    Dislikes:
    -Law: He carries no respect or thought for those who would impose their own will on the many for no appeareant reason and would outright deny any such an authority should they try and contain him in any manner.

    -Technology: While not denying how usefull and convenient things are in modern society it's just too much of a culture shock for him, determined to take it one day at a time; failing miserably as he tries to keep up.

    -Intimacy: With intimacy being restricted to the absolute minimum as to promote independence among the Brutum he's really taken aback by genuine acts of intimacy when directed at himself, making him flustered and embarrased
    when approached in such a way; making it one of the few things to break through his cold demeanor.

    Fears:
    -The taint: While all Brutum carry it he's started to see it in a new light since he was cursed, feeling it tugging at him from within; desperate to gain release which he cannot grant it. The curse having made the Taint a curse in itself or just having revealed its true nature.

    -Weakness: As far as he's been taught your strenght speaks for your worth and as such often worry that he himself will grow weak thanks to the curse cast on him, robbing him of all of his selfworth. And as he starts to realise from watching humans that everyone's supposed to be weak in some way which terrifies him further as he simply can't afford to be weak.

    -Fire: While not truly afraid of fire in a literal sense he finds them discomforting for some reason he can't quite place. When faced with an open flame he can be caught simply staring into it as if trying to remember something, never doing so as he allways looks away eventually. As to whether this is something speaking to him at the genetic level or spiritual one is unclear to him and everyone else at this point.

    Motivations/Goals:
    -The Hunt: The Brutum value the individual over the community and such worth is proven through the hunt, to stalk the fiercest beasts and live to tell the tale. Your age speaks for your skill and thus also your worth. Still trying to uphold what sliver of his simple code there is left he takes pride in slaying the strong, whether man, beast, demons or even gods; whatever proves a worthy challenge.

    -Breaking the curse: The curse has brought him great dishonour as he's now only able to fight to defend himself and others, leaving him unable to fullfill the code and his demonic blood practically boiling from withdrawal which causes him great physical pain at times.

    -Kin's past: While his violent streak ended with the curse he's taken a newfound interest in his kind as a whole, just what they are and how they came into being; considering it a sort of side project despite what it could come to unearth about his kind.


    Appearance
    Hair: Black
    Eyes: Red
    Skin Tone: Pale as ivory
    Height: 6'4
    Weight: 175
    Overall Appearances: (Optional)


    Other

    Guild: Sacred Seas
    Guild Tattoo: Crimson Red / Located in the middle of his chest (Usually covered)





    Last edited by Pale Wolf on Sun Nov 15, 2015 2:11 pm; edited 3 times in total
    avatar
    Mizuko



    Posts : 300
    Join date : 2015-09-07

    Re: Pale Wolf

    Post by Mizuko on Sat Nov 07, 2015 12:40 pm

    Hiya! I'm Mizuko, I'll be going over your app today. Please keep in mind I'm really not trying to offend you in any way. I just want to be sure it fits with the current systems and such ^.^ And so, here are your corrections:

    Perks
    Brutum wrote:
    And as for overall increased physical damage made with and without close range weapons:
    D: 40% C: 60% B: 80% A: 120% S: 160% SS: 200% X: 250%
    So, this isn't quite specified. I'm assuming this is taking the spot of your second perk, which is fine. But, close range weapons need to be defined. Is this non-magical combat purely? Or is this added to any (possibly magical, you've not made a magic yet so I haven't any idea what the attacks would be like) magical and physical attacks? Also, is this added onto the current damage chart found in the magic rules? Or is this it's own, standalone amounts? Even if so, a double + at A-Rank is a bit high. These numbers should probably be lowered.

    As for the first perk, dealing with weights, I'll accept that at S and higher you're lifting over a ton. However though, I do expect that you properly research the weight of, say, a metal bell, if you're going to lift it, so that this doesn't get abused.

    Even so, your overall perks have no weaknesses? They're powerful,, which I get, you wanna be, but for things to be fair, you'd need some sort of race weakness. No race is completely invulnerable.

    Brutum wrote:Long life: While their risky line of work usually leave many tribesmen to die early the average Brutum is assumed to possess lifespans of roughly 500 years, given comparisons to certain sub species with similiar ancestry. In fact no on would know as there is no record of any Brutum having ever died from old age, the Brutum themselves never having heard of such a thing either. While the oldest Brutum in recorded human history had reached his second century before he died there's simply not enough facts to support a solid theory on the Brutum lifespan. Making it uncertain just how long they do live.

    Extremely lengthened life is considered a perk, here. This will either have to be removed, or replace on of your current perks. This also applies to your age in general. It has to be human ranges unless this is a perk.

    Brutum wrote:The "Curse": He has a certain "quirk" forced upon him as he's unable to strike at any living thing for any reason but self-defese or in the defense of others. The "Curse" itself was cast on him by a priest residing in a village where Pale had tracked a demon and cut through a fifth of the village's population while doing so. An important thing to note is that the curse won't bind him in the case he fights opponents that aren't actually alive; counting things such as Golems and Automatons etc.
    Adding that to above would make it the PERFECT weakness, as I mentioned before. Just pop it up into the species description.



    avatar
    Pale Wolf



    Posts : 4
    Join date : 2015-11-03

    Re: Pale Wolf

    Post by Pale Wolf on Sat Nov 07, 2015 5:54 pm

    Hiya, I know you're just doing what you have to do so don't worry about me; I can take it.

    I believe i've dealt with all the problems you voiced over my app by now.

    As for the increased physical damage I believe i've made it clearer what it pertains and hope you think the same.

    I realise I would have to apply common sense as to what I can and can't lift and I never expected any less.

    And do forgive me for not making up for my strenghts with a weakness, it's just that when you read "Perks" your thoughts don't go as far as setbacks and I neglected it completely. While the weakness I did add was supposed to an individual trait rather than a racial one I will add it there for now as I will most likely come to change it eventually as I plan for my char to develop past some of these perks eventually.

    Lastly as for my long life I simply decided I might as well go for the other extreme instead, thinking it won't do much difference and leaving more things for my char to "solve" at some point or another.

    Otherwise I appreciate your honesty and hope you'll be happy with the changes made~
    avatar
    Mizuko



    Posts : 300
    Join date : 2015-09-07

    Re: Pale Wolf

    Post by Mizuko on Sat Nov 07, 2015 10:48 pm

    Enchanted weapons follow the rules of magic :/ They're considered magical items, and, considering that the vast majority of weapons on the site will be enchanted (cause we both know everybody would choose enchanted over non XD) that might get to be a bit much.

    For your second perk, try and provide an example. A user coming to look at that could get a little confused on what exactly the percentages are for. An example will help clarify, so that they can better understand your character ^.^ Plus, an example at what you're getting at would help me personally, as I'm still on the fence as to whether or not the percentages are too high. I kinda wanna see your thought process on this, if that's okay.

    Also, thanks for not being rude <3 I love when members are super polite about what I ask them to correct. XD I probably get more excited than I should about it.
    avatar
    Pale Wolf



    Posts : 4
    Join date : 2015-11-03

    Re: Pale Wolf

    Post by Pale Wolf on Sun Nov 08, 2015 2:30 am

    I think I fixed it now, then again i've been wrong before so feel free to call me on that.

    As for the enchanted weapons I figure I could still roll with it if I halved the benefit granted from the perk while using one such weapon, only going as far as passive abilities and normal attacks as I realise an active ability would be more of spell than anything else which I really shouldn't get to raise in strenght over a perk.

    I tried making an example of the other one and and i'm honestly not sure if I did good or not. It's kind of hard to elaborate on "I hit harder" xD. I DID try and elaborate though so I guess we'll see how that goes won't we? And as for those percentual boost in general I sort of based them around the weight perk in a way. You see: I used the strongest man irl as a basis for how heavy things my char should be able to lift if working at the superhuman level and settled for about having him lift 3 times the weight of what of this person. As such as I figured an overall 200% boost at X-rank would make perfect and adjusted the rest of the numbers after that.

    Lastly you're welcome~ There's really no point in arguing about these kinds of things since you'd still have me edit even if I did voice such concerns. Besides it's not like you're off base or anything, you just point out the flaws and things to expand upon; there's nothing wrong with feedback after all.
    Then again I could just be the nicest person ever Onion 24
    avatar
    Enzeru Metsuki



    Posts : 23
    Join date : 2015-11-04
    Age : 22

    Re: Pale Wolf

    Post by Enzeru Metsuki on Wed Nov 11, 2015 8:44 am

    Hello there, due to recent complications with staff, I will be the one that grades you from here on out. If you have any questions feel free to message me privately or contact me via skype, alex.erm.wtf . If you wish to be graded via skype where it is all live I can document our conversation via paste bin if not lets get the grading started, shall we. I would first like to note whatever is said here is not biast at all it is just proper protocol to follow these set rules we have. If there are rules you feel you are not breaking you are free to message me privately with your proof, in a proper and well mannered behavior, and I will look into fixing the said rule. We want you to have fun here, so as such feed back is much appreciated, now then your grade.

    The Brutum is a race of savage demons once descended from humans that delved into the kind of magic that would make the undead shiver. Now possessing a genetic makeup closer to that of genuine demon than that of men they're physically superior to ordinary humans. While mostly human in appearance their generally unpleasant aura and bright red eyes make them easy to tell apart from the common folk. Most people haven't even heard of them considering that there is but a few small settlements in the world and their numbers being in that of the hundreds for various reasons. While demonic in body they're vastly considered demonic in general as they all make brutal hunters and killers; some having taken to hunting humans rather than beasts in recent years; leaving them with a bad reputation.

    All be it vague, this is acceptable in the eyes of staff, I would have preferred more explanation as to how they were made what they do, but this will suffice.

    Enchanced Strenght: Pale possess abnormal strenght when compared to that of most humanoid species, being able to perform at the superhuman level as it's simply natural for him. It makes it easier for him to lift heavy objects, destructive capabilities and overall damage output from physical attacks which scales as he ranks up to C and beyond.

    As for carriable weight with both his hands:
    D: 600lbs C:1000lbs B:1400lbs A:1800lbs S: 2200lbs SS: 2600lbs X: 3000lbs

    The user also gains percentual boost with non-magical attacks of the physical kind, such as one's fists or a blade held in one's hand. This effect only applies for physical attacks or close range weaponry of the non-magical kind unless under the effect of a support spell or the weapon in question being enchanted while the boost on such weapons would be restricted to normal attacks done with it rather than active abilities and the effect boost granted by this perk cut in half in favor of enchanted weapons relying on their magical effect rather than the physical aspect, thus the same rules aplying to those to some extent. The added on value is also to be considered his base value which in turn gets taken into account when calculating further strenght boosts.
    So if for an exaple the user would attack using his own fists the damage dealt would be equal to the base strenght value plus the new value added unto that which scales as follows:
    D: 30% C: 50% B: 70% A: 100% S: 140% SS: 170% X: 200%

    There is much going on here, so I will break it down piece by piece.
    Pale possess abnormal strenght when compared to that of most humanoid species, being able to perform at the superhuman level as it's simply natural for him. It makes it easier for him to lift heavy objects, destructive capabilities and overall damage output from physical attacks which scales as he ranks up to C and beyond.

    Not that it matters but there are some grammatical errors in here, just thought I point that out, it wouldn't do much to you unless all of your character had grammatical errors, since it is small don't worry about it. This part right here "It makes it easier for him to lift heavy objects, destructive capabilities and overall damage output from physical attacks which scales as he ranks up to C and beyond.", makes it seem it is three perks in one, you can't have three abilities in one, however since this is flavor of text I will go ahead and read some more and give my assessment there.

    As for carriable weight with both his hands:
    D: 600lbs C:1000lbs B:1400lbs A:1800lbs S: 2200lbs SS: 2600lbs X: 3000lbs

    This seems fine, there is one problem though, how will you be able to calculate the given weight of an item say like a building? We have no given rules on weight of objects, so this is why this confuses me a bit but if you have a way for this then awesome if not let me know and I will see if the staff can come up with something.

    The user also gains percentual boost with non-magical attacks of the physical kind, such as one's fists or a blade held in one's hand. This effect only applies for physical attacks or close range weaponry of the non-magical kind unless under the effect of a support spell or the weapon in question being enchanted while the boost on such weapons would be restricted to normal attacks done with it rather than active abilities and the effect boost granted by this perk cut in half in favor of enchanted weapons relying on their magical effect rather than the physical aspect, thus the same rules aplying to those to some extent. The added on value is also to be considered his base value which in turn gets taken into account when calculating further strenght boosts.
    So if for an exaple the user would attack using his own fists the damage dealt would be equal to the base strenght value plus the new value added unto that which scales as follows:
    D: 30% C: 50% B: 70% A: 100% S: 140% SS: 170% X: 200%

    Unfortunately this is considered a second perk and can't be stacked into one perk with your other, another thing is those percentages need to be dropped a bit lower, not only that but the way I see it entirely is like this. 100% is the max damage anyone can do, I get you want an increase in damage but over 100% is over kill, so you may increase it littler by little but over 100% I don't know if I want to allow, not only that but you need specify the damage it is dealt to opponents by rank and your rank what I mean is a char sort of like this.

    D Rank User:
    D Rank Opponent get's 10% more damage dealt to them
    C Rank opponent get's 0% more damage dealt to them

    C Rank User:
    D Rank Opponent get's 15% more damage dealt to them

    so on so forth, if that makes sense, if not I will be happy to help you out with this.

    The "Curse": He has a certain "quirk" forced upon him as he's unable to strike at any living thing for any reason but self-defese or in the defense of others. The "Curse" itself was cast on him by a priest residing in a village where Pale had tracked a demon and cut through a fifth of the village's population while doing so. An important thing to note is that the curse won't bind him in the case he fights opponents that aren't actually alive; counting things such as Golems and Automatons etc.

    I would like to point out that due to having two perks already in your first you have a choice of the three, I also want to say while this perk is fine and everything, I don't think it would be smart to have this "Curse" on your character due to how would you be able to train with PC's and what not, but this up to you.

    As a member of the Brutum tribe he has a pretty simple outlook on things, often remarking that humans has made things way too complicated for themselves. The Brutum just follows their instincts and hunt for the mere sake of it, why must there be something in it, must there be an ulterior motive? Can't they just hunt because that is afterall what they do? Even the few Brutum that do take up a life outside the tribe and the hunt are encouraged to do so if their will is true. All in all, he'd prefer to keep things simple.

    Being a no nonsense kind of guy he's far from the sociable kind and he's usually reluctant to speak, although when he does, he typically has something important to say. He's really blunt when he finally does talk and doesn't exactly beat around the bushes, getting straight to the point regardless of how inconsiderate it is. While many would brush him off as cold hearted he's just unfamiliar with social customs. While not unable to experience human emotions it's all a matter of adapting to him. Fact is that he knows next to nothing about human culture and civilized life in general as he never really interacted with humans like that in the past. He often finds himself lost and confused when faced with modern customs and technologies but refuses to admit so in most cases. While a bit behind in human development he's in no way stupid, being very sharpminded in fact as he often takes notice of details; something to be expected of a hunter.

    In battle he's pretty unorthodox, relying on no code of honour besides that of battle itself; for there to be a winner. Being a close up fighter he relies mostly on his own physical strenght, close to middle ranged spells and spells to keep ensure he stays in close proximity to his opponent. So basically he's the kind of fighter that does about everything to keep it close and personal to finish things as quickly as possible. In fact his agressive fighting style partly stems from his demon blood but also partially from the curse, as it just lets him fight properly for defensive measures he's just so excited that he gets to let loose that he makes the most out of fights when he do finally get himself mixed into one, the curse having ironically made him stronger when it does let him fight. He makes a point out of not wasting more energy than he needs to on opponents weaker than himself and usually manages to do so without wasting more energy than neccessary. Though when fighting an adversary of equal or greater measure than himself he will simply go all out and do whatever it takes too stand up to such opponents while not being the kind of fool to just blindly raise his fist at such adversaries. While he enjoys the thrill of fighting he realises now that there's such a thing as picking your battles, preferably winning ones.

    All thought there is a bit of fluff here and there and some minor grammatical errors, I will allow this personality, good work.

    Likes:
    -The strong: He values the worth of the individual rather than that of the community and carries a deep respect for the few who actually possess true power, often disregarding people with political power as "Pretentious good-for nothings"

    -Fighting: Nature's one true sport, survival of the fittest, the one game that never ends. As a Brutum he feels very much alive while fighting and most would just assume that's because they're nothing short of barbarians in the end. They might not be so far off actually as the Brutum honestly couldn't think of a better sport. As the truest of competitions with all or nothing on the line they consider it the one way you can do things, once again taking pleasure in the simple things

    -Animals: He's often at better odds with animals and beasts as they're kind of like him, simple and honest creatures. So while he's not at the point where he can actually speak with animals he does seem to have a deeper connection with them, they often seeming to enjoy his company as well.

    -Sweets: Having never tasted anything like it before he was at first unsure but has come to develop a bit of a sweet tooth, having taken a liking to pretty much any sort of sweet.

    Going above and beyond on small little sections like this, is what makes me happy, I will approve of this, good job.

    Dislikes:
    -Law: He carries no respect or thought for those who would impose their own will on the many for no appeareant reason and would outright deny any such an authority should they try and contain him in any manner.

    -Technology: While not denying how usefull and convenient things are in modern society it's just too much of a culture shock for him, determined to take it one day at a time; failing miserably as he tries to keep up.

    -Intimacy: With intimacy being restricted to the absolute minimum as to promote independence among the Brutum he's really taken aback by genuine acts of intimacy when directed at himself, making him flustered and embarrased
    when approached in such a way; making it one of the few things to break through his cold demeanor.

    Again small little grammatical errors, but I will allow these, good job

    Fears:
    -The taint: While all Brutum carry it he's started to see it in a new light since he was cursed, feeling it tugging at him from within; desperate to gain release which he cannot grant it. The curse having made the Taint a curse in itself or just having revealed its true nature.

    -Weakness: As far as he's been taught your strenght speaks for your worth and as such often worry that he himself will grow weak thanks to the curse cast on him, robbing him of all of his selfworth. And as he starts to realise from watching humans that everyone's supposed to be weak in some way which terrifies him further as he simply can't afford to be weak.

    -Fire: While not truly afraid of fire in a literal sense he finds them discomforting for some reason he can't quite place. When faced with an open flame he can be caught simply staring into it as if trying to remember something, never doing so as he allways looks away eventually. As to whether this is something speaking to him at the genetic level or spiritual one is unclear to him and everyone else at this point.

    Hate repeating myself but same as above.

    Motivations/Goals:
    -The Hunt: The Brutum value the individual over the community and such worth is proven through the hunt, to stalk the fiercest beasts and live to tell the tale. Your age speaks for your skill and thus also your worth. Still trying to uphold what sliver of his simple code there is left he takes pride in slaying the strong, whether man, beast, demons or even gods; whatever proves a worthy challenge.

    -Breaking the curse: The curse has brought him great dishonour as he's now only able to fight to defend himself and others, leaving him unable to fullfill the code and his demonic blood practically boiling from withdrawal which causes him great physical pain at times.

    -Kin's past: While his violent streak ended with the curse he's taken a newfound interest in his kind as a whole, just what they are and how they came into being; considering it a sort of side project despite what it could come to unearth about his kind.

    Yet again, same as above.

    Hair: Black
    Eyes: Red
    Skin Tone: Pale as ivory
    Height: 6'4
    Weight: 175
    Overall Appearances: (Optional)

    175 what? we need a unit of measure please.

    Guild: Sacred Seas
    Guild Tattoo: Crimson Red / Located in the middle of his chest (Usually covered

    This is fine

    Overall you have some slight changes you need to make but once you make them I will happily grade you again, you have my information if you need to contact me privately, have a good day and good luck!
    avatar
    Selenia



    Posts : 760
    Join date : 2015-10-11
    Age : 22

    Re: Pale Wolf

    Post by Selenia on Sat Nov 28, 2015 12:39 pm

    Bumping. If no response is made to this app within a week, app will be archived, thanks!




    Sponsored content

    Re: Pale Wolf

    Post by Sponsored content


      Current date/time is Mon Sep 25, 2017 6:32 am