Demon Mastery

Hi, my name is Genesis and I will be grading your app today. Before we get started I would like to inform you since your rank isn't approved yet I will be grading the magic as if you were D rank. I will do a more advance grading once you are approved. Now I would like to request you change your rank to D for now, at least until your rank is approved.

Eren wrote:

Demon Mastery

S-Rank	Caster	Darkness
Main	Rusty Hearts	Species-Specific

Offense/Defense

Magic Description

Demon Mastery is the art of capturing and enslaving defeated demons. These demons come in all kinds of different forms, from small, imp-like creatures to giants with the power to destroy buildings with a single blow. After these creatures have been defeated, they can be marked with the user's Binding Blade by stabbing it into the demon's body, where a mark will appear, making them his property. Once marked, the demon will disappear into a dimension parallel to our own, where they cannot be detected by normal humans. The demons one has marked can be used in spells, usually by summoning parts of their respective bodies from portals of varying sizes in order to perform attacks. These portals are round, purple discs with various patterns on them, similar to magic circles. Eren also posesses some power of his own, allowing him to use a few spells on his own.

Perks of Magic

Demon Dimension: This is the dimension in which Eren keeps the demons he's enslaved. This dimension is parallel to our own, and allows the demons to stay unseen. The demons are also kept detained here, as they cannot affect anything in the real world unless Eren opens a portal. The amount of demons and objects this dimension can hold is equal to the limit for Requip mages.

Demon Scout:

Appearance:

One of the first demons Eren captured, this small creature known as "Swift" can scout ahead of Eren to check for dangers and telepathically alert him of and dangers or points of interests once he gets back to him. He is bound to Eren, though, so he can only travel up to 100m away from him. Please explain on who this is a magic perk? This seems more as if it were a summon rather than perk.

Binding Blade:

Appearance:

Eren can summon this giant, two-handed sword at will. It is used in the marking of demons, and can also be used as a melee weapon. Again like the above perk please explain how this is a magic perk. This seems more like a spell to me. 

Weaknesses

If Eren's demons are in any way damaged after their attack, they will have to regenerate for two posts. Elaborate more please. Are the demons able to do anything when damaged? Demon Slayers are, of course, very dangerous to Eren, as they inflict more damage onto him and his demons.

Strengths

This magic is very fast due to the opponent being unable to see the attack coming before it hits them. I'm going to have to stop you right here. The way you worded this seems like autohitting, considering it sounds like the opponent has no time to defend themselves before they are hit by the attack. I request you either reword this strength or subsitute it for another one This also allows for suprise attacks.

Spells

Demonic Strike I:

Demonic Strike II:

Demonic Block:

Asura's Fist:

Asura's Fist II:

Asura's Fist III:

Asura's Block:

Heel Stomp:

Flurry Punch:

Flamethrower:

Sasha's Wrath:

Demon Shield:

Ouboros's Strike:

© Fairy Tail Online

Bump when edits are made~

Bumpty Dumpty

Eren wrote:

Demon Mastery

D-Rank	Caster	Darkness
Main	Rusty Hearts	Species-Specific

Offense/Defense

Magic Description

Demon Mastery is the art of capturing and enslaving defeated demons. These demons come in all kinds of different forms, from small, imp-like creatures to giants with the power to destroy buildings with a single blow. After these creatures have been defeated, they can be marked with the user's Binding Blade by stabbing it into the demon's body, where a mark will appear, making them his property. Once marked, the demon will disappear into a dimension parallel to our own, where they cannot be detected by normal humans. The demons one has marked can be used in spells, usually by summoning parts of their respective bodies from portals of varying sizes in order to perform attacks. These portals are round, purple discs with various patterns on them, similar to magic circles. Eren also posesses some power of his own, allowing him to use a few spells on his own.

Perks of Magic

Demon Dimension: This is the dimension in which Eren keeps the demons he's enslaved. This dimension is parallel to our own, and allows the demons to stay unseen. The demons are also kept detained here, as they cannot affect anything in the real world unless Eren opens a portal. The amount of demons and objects this dimension can hold is equal to the limit for Requip mages.

Demonic Speed: Eren's body gets covered in a dark blue-ish energy, allowing him to move faster. This raises his speed stat by 1 rank for two posts with three posts of cooldown at D-Rank. I'm going to need the duration and cooldown for each rank. Also once you reach A rank you can boost two stats, please refer to the stat guidelines for more information

Demonic Strength: Eren's body gets covered in a dark reddish energy, raising his strength. This raises his strength stat by 1 rank for two posts with three posts ofcooldown at D-Rank. Same as demonic speed

Weaknesses

If Eren's demons are in any way damaged after their attack, they will have to regenerate for two posts, during which they cannot perform in any spells. Demon Slayers are, of course, very dangerous to Eren, as they inflict more damage onto him and his demons. How much more damage?

Strengths

This magic is very fast due to the opponent being unable to see the attack coming before shortly before it hits them. Considering all your spells move at the same speed as the other spells in a different magic I would request you to elaborate on this strength more This also allows for suprise *surprise attacks.

Spells

Demonic Strike:

Binding Blade:

Demonic Block:

Asura's Fist:

Asura's Fist II:

Asura's Fist III:

Asura's Block:

Heel Stomp:

Flurry Punch:

Flamethrower:

I understand that your rank is approved but until the outcome of your trail has been decided I will be grading you as an A rank mage. You cannot have any S rank spells yet and only one A rank. Please remove one A rank spell before I begin

Sasha's Wrath:

Demon Shield:

Ouboros's Strike:

© Fairy Tail Online

Bump when edits are made~

Edits have been made.

Eren wrote:

Demon Mastery

A-Rank	Caster	Darkness
Main	Rusty Hearts	Species-Specific

Offense/Defense

Magic Description

Demon Mastery is the art of capturing and enslaving defeated demons. These demons come in all kinds of different forms, from small, imp-like creatures to giants with the power to destroy buildings with a single blow. After these creatures have been defeated, they can be marked with the user's Binding Blade by stabbing it into the demon's body, where a mark will appear, making them his property. Once marked, the demon will disappear into a dimension parallel to our own, where they cannot be detected by normal humans. The demons one has marked can be used in spells, usually by summoning parts of their respective bodies from portals of varying sizes in order to perform attacks. These portals are round, purple discs with various patterns on them, similar to magic circles. Eren also posesses some power of his own, allowing him to use a few spells on his own.

Perks of Magic

Demon Dimension: This is the dimension in which Eren keeps the demons he's enslaved. This dimension is parallel to our own, and allows the demons to stay unseen. The demons are also kept detained here, as they cannot affect anything in the real world unless Eren opens a portal. The amount of demons and objects this dimension can hold is equal to the limit for Requip mages.

Demonic Speed: Eren's body gets covered in a dark blue-ish energy, allowing him to move faster. This raises his speed stat by the following table according to his rank:

Spoiler:

Demonic Strength: Eren's body gets covered in a dark reddish energy, raising his strength. This raises his strength stat by the following table according to his rank:

Spoiler:

Weaknesses

If Eren's demons are in any way damaged after their attack, they will have to regenerate for two posts, during which they cannot perform in any spells. Demon Slayers are, of course, very dangerous to Eren, as they inflict twice as much damage onto him and his demons.

Strengths

This magic has large variety in the effects of its spells, due to the large differences between demons.

Spells

Demonic Strike:

Binding Blade:

Demonic Block:

Asura's Fist:

Asura's Fist II:

Asura's Fist III:

Asura's Block:

Heel Stomp:

Flurry Punch:

Flamethrower:

Sasha's Wrath:

© Fairy Tail Online

Bump when edits are made

Bump

Final edits~

So I just realized your strengths and weaknesses don't match up. They have to. What I recommend for strength is elemental advantage against light but it would make sense if your magic were to have a weakness towards it as well so what I recommend is another slayer weakness would be that slayers can eat some of your darkness spells.

Also for spells such as demonic block and flurry punch has the dimensions in the descriptions. Please move them to the appearance sections.

Bump when edits are made~

Bump

Well I am happy to say that this app is approved!